February 28, 2005
2:53 AM

I'd love to be sleeping right now, but my mind is worked up. The body is jerking about with a pain in my arms that is making it hard for me to relax. I'm thinking too much right now. Sigh...

I'm frustrated to be honest. Frustrated with violence and the woop woop/bling bling American public. Why am I so fascinated with this to the point of anger? But I am. I'm angry that I live in a country that continually ranks at the top. The top of what? The lowest educated society of a world power, that's what. World power? Hmmmm... Where our youth is more fixed on the latest American Idol finalist as compared to the idea that perhaps a woman will run for President in 2008. Or that more people can name the name of every rapper to have a hit this year, than to name who is Sec. of State.

Why do I even care? Maybe I should leave the country and listen to those who say "If you don't like it, then leave!!". To be honest, if my mom wasn't still alive, I'd be gone in a second. I feel like I am a part of a society that is driven by greed and corruption. Everything needs to be faster, stronger, cheaper, etc. etc.. With every corner of land, we build a new mall. We knock down the ma and pa business and up goes another wal mart. This is evolving?

I live in a city(San Jose) that only cares about bringing PF CHANGS type restaurants and House of Blues type of entertainment to their beloved city. Why so bitter you ask? Not 100% sure, but there was a fight at the YMCA earlier today. I wasn't involved, except to help break things up. These individuals were out of control. The idea that people would fight over a game is ridiculous. And to hear two grown men who are supposedly civilized scream "I'm gonna kill you, you mother fucker" is so sad. It's made me think and wonder why the human being reacts with such anger. We're no different than a wild animal. We fight wars to to teach other nations that we won't tolerate their injustices, yet we can't even monitor our own nation.

BLAH BLAH BLAH. I apologize as I'm starting to get delirious and hopefully I'm not sounding like a broken record. My politics run deep, but I rarely share ideas of such magnitude to strangers. My actions hopefully speak for louder than words. But anyways, thanks for letting me vent some steam. I just have this vision in my head of these grown men fighting to the point that they're ready to kill each other. And over what? A game? Oh boy.
AGAIN, BLAH BLAH BLAH... Please body, go to sleep.
Peace, mike

9:23 AM
Not much sleep last night, but I feel ok. I got up around 45 minutes ago. At around 3:30 AM I ate two huge bowls of cereal in an attempt to fall asleep. I guess it worked. The cereal tasted good. It was honey nut cheerios with vanilla soy milk. Yummmm....

This past weekend I drove and drove and drove. For those who know me well....Ummmm... this is not something I enjoy doing, but the band Polysics were playing and I made the travels to see them. First was San Francisco where they played a club called HOTEL UTAH. With a capacity of probably 80 people, they crammed in over 100 as far as I could tell, which made for an extremely uncomfortable environment to be in. My back pains were not so happy that night. But the band still rocked as they always do.

I wanted to see them on a good stage, so I traveled to Monterey the next night to see them again. Heading over hwy 17, we(me and Monica) stopped by our friend Django's to see his new home. It was in Scotts Valley, just south of Santa Cruz. DOH!! The place was beautiful. Huge redwoods everywhere and a peaceful ambience to drive the sanest insane. What a great place to visit, but yeah I think I'd go crazy there. Plus the thought of Jason Vorhees from the FRIDAY THE 13th MOVIES coming to kill me at night. ummm..yeah

Off to Monterey. The bands manager had told me they would be going on around 10, so we planned our arrival at 9, just to be sure. The opening bands were still sound checking and the music didn't even start until around 9:45. The first band was so bad. I'm usually pretty tolerant on all kinds of music, especially young bands who are just having fun. But perhaps my angry outlook of late made me the grinch. The band was like a carbon copy of all the screamo type of music. Who am I to judge, but damn I hate that music.

At 10:15 they were still on stage(The screamo band) and there was still another opener to go before Polysics. I finally just took Monicas hand and said let's leave I can't take it anymore. And so we did. The long journey to Monterey for nothing. Oh well.

And then yesterday was anxiety, anxiety, anxiety. Hopefully today is better. Be well.

Peace, mike park